Halloumi No-Meat Balls

I realized awhile ago that my kids don’t really care what meat goes into their meatballs. It’s more the idea of a meatball as a savory tender something alongside (but not touching!) their pasta that draws them in. So it actually caused less of a stir than anticipated when I informed them that I had put cheese, not meat, in their dinner.

The thing is, Halloumi isn’t like any other cheese. It is pungent, briny, and intense, with a bouncy density. It comes from Cyprus, a Mediterranean island, and has protected naming status, similar to Champagne. It has the kind of depth that makes it a knockout substitute for ground meat. Here, it gets shredded on a box grater and mixed with many of the usual meatball suspects—breadcrumbs, eggs, and spices. The issue with many meatless swaps is they want to fall apart, as they lack the binding ability of meat proteins to create firm structure once cooked. But Halloumi gets only slightly oozy when heated, and immediately firms up so these no-meat balls stay intact as they swim in an aromatic tomato sauce and are served up to discerning eaters of any age.

Unlike many styles of cheese, like cheddar or feta, that have innumerable styles and levels of quality, Halloumi’s controlled production and status means that pretty much any brand you find is likely to be fantastic. While you can certainly eat it right out of the package, its squeaky firm texture (and herbaceous and briny flavor) improves further once grilled or seared, allowing its natural sugars and proteins to caramelize.